Saturday, June 12, 2010

I smiled a lot today

Gahhh. It has been an emotionally draining day. Before I get into the emotional draining part, let me give you a little background on myself:

My parents divorced when I was a mere 2 years old. My Mom remarried when I was 3 and had my (half) brother when I was 4. My real father was not a big part in most of my life. My (then) step-dad was more like a real father to me, considering he was around from the time I was 3 years old. ANYWAY, when I was 16 years old, I started dating someone my parents did not approve of. This caused a big wedge between my step-father and I, which in turn caused a big wedge between my mother and I. They tried to keep me from seeing him but instead of listening to them and following the rules, I started rebelling & getting into more trouble. Needless to say my parents had had enough and gave me an ultimatum to either stop seeing this boy, or pack my crap and move out of their house. I chose to move out; leaving my mom, step-dad, and little brother behind. I moved in with my boyfriend and his family (at 16, gasp! yes, I know). I think my parents thought it was going to be a temporary thing and I would come crawling back to them. Well, that never happened. About a year after I moved out of my parents house, my parents got a divorce. It was a messy divorce, causing much drama in all of our lives. My mother and I have always wanted to be a part of my brother and step-father's lives but because of the way the divorce went down, they would have nothing to do with us. Over the years, things have gotten better, and we have all done a lot of growing up. Which brings me to today.

My little brother graduated from high school today. My mother and I did not get a graduation announcement or invitation, but decided we were not going to let that stop us from watching him graduate. I was so BEYOND excited that I was going to get to see my little brother, but had no expectations as to what was going to take place afterwards.

Was I going to get to see them? Were they going to talk to me? Were they going to completely ignore me? Is Gavin finally gonna get to meet his Uncle Brenden? Are they going to be nice and civil?

I didn't know. All I knew going there, was that I was at least going to get to see him walk across the stage, and I was going to try my damnedest to get a hug and maybe a picture with them. Well all of that happened. I got to see both of them after, we talked a little, we told each other how much we missed one another, I got a big, long hug from both of them. & pictures with my brother. It was wonderful. I have had so many emotions towards them through the past few years and have kept them all inside for the longest time, and they all came out today; in an out pour of tears.
It was so nice to see him all grown up, but so sad to know his not little anymore. I was so happy to see them, but sad to go home, not knowing what the future holds. I was so proud of him, but so sad that I have not been a part of his life through his high school years.

There was a lot going through my head. But overall it was a good day. Here is a picture of us together, finally, after a long 6 years without one.

This really made me smile. Gavin and Brenden :)

Visit Brenden and Steve.

And if you were wondering... Yes, the boyfriend that my parents did not approve of is now my husband.


Mandy said...

So glad you were able to have a wonderful day with them! I hope things work out for all of you in the future

kimberly said...

That's so awesome! Time does heal wounds...even hard headed ol' folks like me soften a bit in age.


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